Outlier
Outlier. Anomaly. Misfit. Maverick.
These are words I’ve used to explain myself over the years. In coping with my ongoing identity ‘crisises’, there was always the need to describe myself with an adjective. Weirdo seemed too common so I found big big English!
Anyways I’m writing this to a fellow weirdo. And we are all weirdos in some way. We all don’t fit in sometimes and in ways. And that’s what makes us unique as humans. That God didn’t produce us in a factory assembly line either physically or mentally. He made us unique and for that reason we will always stand out!
Unfortunately we live in a world and generation which demands the opposite. Our world cries for uniformity. And joining in the trends. For a generation that preaches individuality — we ironically dread it collectively. One of the most valid fears is FOMO — The Fear of Missing Out.
For some like me we actually had no choice than to miss out. I spent majority of my secondary school days as a developing teenager missing out. I couldn’t go out for sports. Surely couldn’t participate because of physical conditions. In SS1 our set went to Shere Hills for Citizen and Leadership Training and I went in a POP Cylindrical cast on my left leg. To my classmates “I was chilling” because I didn’t do any of the physical activities but to me I was suffering. I went through psychological trauma those two weeks and have tried to avoid any situations where I’d have to watch people do what I couldn’t. It wasn’t just Shere Hills. Generally I began to pull back as a form of “Identity”. I felt special being a weird person. But FOMO still cried out.
Recently I found myself in a situation where someone was always trying to make me change. Love ba can do you shege. I wasn’t accepted as I was but was seen as a Project to be conformed to an image. Don’t conclude yet but follow me to the end.
Then came the Young — Uncle Paradox (I feel I’ve written this article before). At my age I honestly feel I should be above identify criseses and FOMO but here we are. Judging by what I see 50 year olds and above do I don’t think we ever get it. I have learnt a few things however;
- One of my Living Principles is Alone I Came - Alone I Will Go. There was literally only one person born at the exact millisecond on the day you were born in the year you were born in the world. And only one person will die at the millisecond you die. You don’t have to fit in or twin with anybody. Be yourself. No one can do you like you.
- Don’t Intentionally Miss out on Life in the Process of “Being Different”. I’ve done this so many times and I regret it. Live to the fullest. Participate in group activities. Do things you enjoy. Don’t always be in a hurry to mark yourself out.
- You are a SPEC. My sister hates this word but it fits the purpose. You are specially crafted. Created the way you are by God both physically and psychologically for a reason. You don’t have to change or adapt for others to like you. Yes you should be in a constant self growth and development process but because you see the need to — not because another human is forcing you. God will bring the people who love you the way you are and yes you will grow and adapt around them but not under pressure.
- Everyone Around You is a Spec. And Love those around you for who they are. Yes encourage change and growth but do not rub it in their faces assiduously. Pray and hint when the opportunity comes.
- To Thine Own Self And God be True. This is the golden principle. Las las only God and you are responsible for you and you are answerable to only God.
God’s Grace and Peace to you as you live as Different and Special yet Involved in this World.
